tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.comments2024-02-25T22:49:44.451-08:00Point of Contact - A Communications Skills BlogRich Gallagher, LMFThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14070819187873592934noreply@blogger.comBlogger82125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-87672725017650516912016-09-29T20:53:38.687-07:002016-09-29T20:53:38.687-07:00In my own education and career in America, I'v...In my own education and career in America, I've noticed that many first-generation East Asians (i.e., from China, Japan, Korea) tend to be non-assertive, passive, quiet in school discussion groups, contests, competitions, etc. Very "cultural" and "Asian," so to speak. However, this doesn't seem to be true among East Indians in America. They tend to be verbal, confident, assertive, even confrontational and aggressive. I have thought about this difference a great deal. My own explanation: most Indian Americans spoke English as their first language at home and in school in India, many attended top universities in India (e.g., I.I.T.), and were the cream of the crop when they left India to attend college or grad school in America. They are 100% convinced that, in order to succeed in corporate America, they have to be more "American" and more driven. Thus, it is really no big surprise to me that we recently see so many Indian American CEO's in corporate America (not nearly as many Chinese American, Japanese American, Korean American) -- especially in tech (e.g., Microsoft, Google/Alphabet, Adobe, VISA, PepsiCo, etc). A strong example of the cultural aspect of tooting one's horn. <br /><br />Interestingly, there is a generational (age) aspect to this cultural perspective of tooting. What I said above about East Asians versus Indian Americans is true primarily for the first-generation . . . and is not generally true of the younger (2nd, 3rd, 4th) generations. Here, among our young people who are born in America, East Asians are every bit as <br />competitive, assertive, and aggressive on school and in their careers as the Indian Americans. (I have noticed this in my own extended family; we have many intermarriage among our younger generations.)hfong42https://www.blogger.com/profile/07313895543115918911noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-24719947435418646222016-09-29T19:57:47.445-07:002016-09-29T19:57:47.445-07:00I feel you are absolutely correct Henry - there is...I feel you are absolutely correct Henry - there is a huge cultural context here, and everything is relative to that context. Well put!Rich Gallagher, LMFThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14070819187873592934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-72801137521145301462016-09-29T19:50:15.438-07:002016-09-29T19:50:15.438-07:00A well-balanced, thoughtful article. Agree with vi...A well-balanced, thoughtful article. Agree with virtually everything you covered. Only one item would improve your article, in my opinion -- a discussion on the cultural aspects of tooting. How one reacts to someone's tooting his/her own horns depends largely on that person's culture (race, ethnicity, family background, economic status, education level, success). "Where you stand depends on where you sit." (I made this saying up when I was in college, after observing a large number of people of different cultures, intelligence, economic backgrounds, political preference, and race.) <br />hfong42https://www.blogger.com/profile/07313895543115918911noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-71462335485097298762016-09-29T19:36:52.023-07:002016-09-29T19:36:52.023-07:00Thanks Richard!Thanks Richard!Rich Gallagher, LMFThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14070819187873592934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-38144555091482890042016-09-29T19:35:58.131-07:002016-09-29T19:35:58.131-07:00Well said!Well said!Richard Bradleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02493335507103769022noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-31302756410017232832016-07-30T17:51:17.213-07:002016-07-30T17:51:17.213-07:00Hi Ron - thoughtfully put. I see your point, but f...Hi Ron - thoughtfully put. I see your point, but from a slightly different direction.<br /><br />I agree that some people are irrational or incapable of dialogue, especially if they are emotionally or politically overinvested about an issue. Both sides are often guilty of this. My point is that if you play back their view of the world, *as they see it*, well enough that their head is nodding up and down, you stand your very best chance of engaging them in dialogue. You don't have to agree with them - at all - or sugarcoat your own views. You simply have to get where they are coming from, and do it first.<br /><br />Incidentally, this is a basic tenet of marriage and family therapy. I think the world would be a better place if everyone became an LMFT! Thanks Ron.Rich Gallagher, LMFThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14070819187873592934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-53928454264827798582016-07-30T16:14:43.983-07:002016-07-30T16:14:43.983-07:00Sorry Rich, I'm with you all the way up to ass...Sorry Rich, I'm with you all the way up to assuming the people on the other side are rational actors. Sometimes they're not. Those on the Republican side who are rational actors are mostly keeping their mouths shut to avoid the wrath of the mob. There's no arguing with people who can't even acknowledge that they have the wrong facts, or no facts, backing their argument, who hate just because they've been told they should. You can't argue with people who believe that science is a global communist conspiracy to undermine the American way. There's no point in having discussions with zealots, because unless you're a true believer, they can't hear you. (don't try to respond with gmail, I never check that account :) )Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17078437560575591899noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-72314231263399004642015-07-14T15:36:23.103-07:002015-07-14T15:36:23.103-07:00I remember someone telling my that you will never ...I remember someone telling my that you will never stop working because you will always look at it as something and you will want more. I am trying to implement this mentality as much as possible. I really love speaking and I am hoping that the business of it doesn't go down because I will be doing it always. <a href="http://noahstjohn.com/about-noah/media/" rel="nofollow">http://noahstjohn.com/about-noah/media/</a>Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-44855080916333422632015-03-24T04:28:35.345-07:002015-03-24T04:28:35.345-07:00Hey there, Rich! Thank you so much for this great ...Hey there, Rich! Thank you so much for this great shout-out. I appreciate YOU, buddy!<br />-- DavidDavid Newmanhttp://www.doitmarketing.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-64817035755295189552015-02-15T12:27:00.751-08:002015-02-15T12:27:00.751-08:00great article. I wish someone (maybe you) would co...great article. I wish someone (maybe you) would come up with a do-it-yourself family therapy kit with workbooks and audio for the entire family....Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-85929446144845769872014-12-01T18:27:08.595-08:002014-12-01T18:27:08.595-08:00Thanks and hugs backatcha to all of you! Look forw...Thanks and hugs backatcha to all of you! Look forward to seeing you all later this month!Rich Gallagher, LMFThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14070819187873592934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-42172488132919951942014-12-01T16:29:08.886-08:002014-12-01T16:29:08.886-08:00Happy Birthday, Rich!
Hugs,
Maureen, Darrell, an...Happy Birthday, Rich!<br /><br />Hugs,<br /><br />Maureen, Darrell, and KatieMaureen Andersonhttp://www.maureenanderson.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-84457913704979290742014-07-17T14:03:29.534-07:002014-07-17T14:03:29.534-07:00I've been taking a lot of classes on marketing...I've been taking a lot of classes on marketing to find better ways to get notice for my books, and it felt like I was training to be a pain in the butt. Thank you for confirming my instincts.Jacqueline Vickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17066655287551999883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-39710998181589041282014-07-14T20:49:34.244-07:002014-07-14T20:49:34.244-07:00This doesn't even count the relentless quest t...This doesn't even count the relentless quest to get your address and phone number! I once paid cash -- four dollars -- for a summer top on sale...and still the cashier wanted that information.<br /><br />On an unrelated note but speaking of Hondas, that's why we love them. There's no bickering on price. “You want the new Accord? Here’s how much it costs. The end.” <br /><br />Give me your best deal, and give it to me up front. I’ll either go for it or I won’t, but either way we can get on with our lives.Maureen Andersonhttp://www.maureenanderson.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-26519778654742524572014-03-19T17:09:37.791-07:002014-03-19T17:09:37.791-07:00Good advice, Rich. Way to go . . BTW, 8 is a lucky...Good advice, Rich. Way to go . . BTW, 8 is a lucky number in the Chinese culture. I've always known there's some "Chinese" blood in you, ha ha.<br />hfong42https://www.blogger.com/profile/07313895543115918911noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-79327911472558000042014-02-10T13:23:32.811-08:002014-02-10T13:23:32.811-08:00You are a shining example of charter membership in...You are a shining example of charter membership in the first group Patricia - thanks and great watching your success grow!Rich Gallagher, LMFThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14070819187873592934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-39613351876317983302014-02-10T13:21:10.906-08:002014-02-10T13:21:10.906-08:00Lets have a First Group Club:) Thanks for another ...Lets have a First Group Club:) Thanks for another great post.<br />My best,<br />Patricia RossiPatricia Rossihttp://www.patriciarossi.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-66258237713880812512013-10-02T23:57:26.039-07:002013-10-02T23:57:26.039-07:00Great guiding words! I believe there's a lot o...Great guiding words! I believe there's a lot of truth to that. It's strange how the smallest things even in just decorating a living room or cleaning a cluttered space can change a mood, thought pattern, outlook, making someone a more positive person. Success starts with the person believing in themselves. I can't say I have fully implemented that style, but now I know for sure.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-49995737522491557352013-05-03T20:03:00.328-07:002013-05-03T20:03:00.328-07:00Maureen, it is so kind of you to cheer me on, and ...Maureen, it is so kind of you to cheer me on, and I am so happy for you AND your daughter for taking the first step on your own respective incredible journeys. <br /><br />It is such a pleasure to be on your show - you are one of the best interviewers ever. Best of success to both of you!Rich Gallagher, LMFThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14070819187873592934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-13886640882495230552013-05-02T07:37:17.827-07:002013-05-02T07:37:17.827-07:00You're a great example, Rich -- maybe the best...You're a great example, Rich -- maybe the best -- of how going after your dreams is the best way to inspire others to do that.<br /><br />I love hosting the talk show so much more for having your guest appearances to look forward to. <br /><br />I'm genuinely excited for -- as opposed to jealous of -- our daughter, who heads to NYC for college this fall. Because thanks to your coaching, I'm equally excited for a new chapter in my professional life.<br /><br />And I'm glad you're basking in what you've accomplished. It's a great reminder for the rest of us to look back with fondness on what we've pulled off in our own lives.Maureen Andersonhttp://www.thecareerclinic.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-7343749776191878902013-04-30T00:02:47.038-07:002013-04-30T00:02:47.038-07:00You are the best Patricia - thank you so much for ...You are the best Patricia - thank you so much for your kind words! Beautifully put, and I am going to shamelessly steal your line about hopes. Great watching you soar too. Have a great spring!<br /><br />Best, RichRich Gallagher, LMFThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14070819187873592934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-67364078737913983312013-04-29T17:10:59.048-07:002013-04-29T17:10:59.048-07:00Congrats Rich~
Nothing better than reaching those...Congrats Rich~<br /><br />Nothing better than reaching those hopes that root around in our hearts. Those hopes, constantly heckle us until we do something about it. So proud for you and Colleen. <br /><br />Bravo,<br />Patricia RossiPatricia Rossihttp://www.patriciarossi.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-45484298833084555042013-02-23T15:24:44.863-08:002013-02-23T15:24:44.863-08:00I wish, Stan. One thing has been a constant in 15 ...I wish, Stan. One thing has been a constant in 15 years of training: the companies who quote-unquote "need" it are never interested, and the people who hire me are already good and trying to be even better. Thanks for your comment!Rich Gallagher, LMFThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14070819187873592934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-78000242215133709742013-02-23T15:21:12.918-08:002013-02-23T15:21:12.918-08:00Oh, Rich... I want to live in a USA (or a world), ...Oh, Rich... I want to live in a USA (or a world), where the response YOU wrote is typical, and the response THEY wrote is a sure sign a company will be gone soon (and good riddance!). I applaud your efforts to get us closer to that ideal. Any chance of you getting to retrain the person who wrote that boilerplate for the big box store, or at least have him/her sit in one of your seminars?Stannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10119240.post-78497398104452048352012-09-23T22:37:01.231-07:002012-09-23T22:37:01.231-07:00Beautifully put Laura, and I hope your father is d...Beautifully put Laura, and I hope your father is doing well. Wow, he deserves a lot of credit for starting over in his mid-60s. Thank you!Rich Gallagher, LMFThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14070819187873592934noreply@blogger.com